So, whilst reading one of the more highbrow examples of UK journalistic excellence (Closer magazine) I came across an interesting phenomenon called 'Objectum Sexual', which is Latin for 'wants to shag objects'. One common condition of this is feeling sexual desire to important landmarks. The Berlin Wall and The Statue of Liberty were widely lusted over and the sufferers faithfully saved up to be able to go and visit these architectural delights and sate their urges. Now, I've never been to the Berlin Wall, but it may be worth it to see if I can find anyone furtively wanking within its vicinity. It also explains the hithertofore mystery of the perennial popularity of those badly crafted minuture statues sold at tourist outlets.
Another sufferer led a very tragic life indeed because her parents simply could not relate, and her only boyfriend dumped her because she fancied a flag more than him. What a crushing blow to the ego. Apparently she found the way they fluttered in the wind very arousing. Luckily (or perhaps not) she lived in America - that great nation of patriotic flagbearers. Every 4th July or similar day of jingoistic foolery was equivalent to being waterboarded for this poor woman.
I've never understood this pecularity, preferring perhaps erroneously, someone with a soul and capability for semi-intelligent conversation. But I've just winked at my hair straighteners and I am going to see what happens.
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